PB&C and #90sProblems

Alright everyone, I know I promised to keep this updated more frequently, but I’ve been busy saving money for my trip over Thanksgiving down to the Florida Keys so I haven’t been as busy on the weekends as I would like and therefore don’t have much to write about…at least not on a regular basis.  So I decided that after my stressful post last time around I would make this post about things that made me smile over the past few weeks:

1.       For those of you who know me best, you will recall that I have a strong affinity for peanut butter.  And what’s better than peanut butter? How about peanut butter and chocolate?!!  Now you’re saying…”Zach, we get it, peanut butter is great…get to the point”  Calm down blog reader, I’m getting there!  Today, Houselady decided to make peanut butter…wait for it…PIE!!! Let’s delve into this thing part by part:  She started with an oreo crumb crust which was soaked in butter and pressed against a pie tin…then she whipped peanut butter and something else amazing together while mixing in peanuts and pecans (Note: I love pecans).  And as if that weren’t enough, then Houselady did the unthinkable…she drizzled the top with caramel and chocolate topping (you know…the kind that freezes to the top of ice cream to create a shell).  Every bite of this pie was filled with peanut butter, chocolate, oreo crumb, and awesome.  The best part of all of this is that she made 2 pies for her family and 1 for “us” to share…(note: I may be 230#’s the next time you see me)

 this is the picture of it I took seconds before devouring 2 (maybe 3) large pieces

2.       Watching Southern people makes me smile.  Make no mistake about it folks, the South is still 99% sure that they will “rise again” and they aren’t afraid to advertise it on their oversized trucks.  (Note: I would like to make a distinction between “Floridians” and “Southern People.”  Floridians are just happy people who enjoy the weather and beaches and drive sedans.  Southern People (typically born in/ transplanted from Georgia, Alabama, or Mississippi) are a whole different kind of person and typically drive trucks that have no muffler)  For instance, some of the bumper stickers that I’ve seen in the past week include: 1.) “I heart G.R.I.T.S.” Upon asking the patron what his sticker meant, this good ole Southern boy answered “Girls Raised In The South” (cute); 2.) “The South Will Rise Again” (not unexpected); and 3.)  (my favorite) “On the 8^th Day, God Created the South”  (note: this must be in those textbooks their using in the Texas public school system)

3.       The pool, the weather, driving with my windows down, seafood festivals every weekend, and my new Homosassa Anytime Fitness shirt #thingsthatmakemesmilebutdontdeserveanentirenumber

4.       Today, while discussing Disney movies at work (obviously), AM (a PTA…whom you’ll remember from the Flugtag post) and I began to discuss the Newsies (Note: she had never heard of it…which was hard for me to believe until I polled everyone in the clinic and no one else had heard of it either…add this to the many issues I have with the South).  During our discussion, we got into how old the movie was…do you realize that movie came out in 1992?!? It’s almost 20 years old!  The conversation quickly changed to how much things have changed since the 90’s and we came up with a list of things that wouldn’t be an issue in today’s world…confused?  Let me give you an example: Programming the VCR #90’sproblems; I don’t have any change for the payphone #90’sproblems; I forgot to feed my DigiPet and it died #90’sproblems.  Got it?  Good!  (and if you don’t, google VR troopers or Salute Your Shorts…you’ll get there eventually)

Alright everyone, that’s it for today!  In 9 days, I will be making the 8 hour drive down to Key West to check out the beaches down that way and along the East coast of Florida.  I will definitely try to take notes of anything I see and do!  If anyone would like to join me instead of spending time with your families on Thanksgiving (lame), let me know, fly to Tampa, and I’ll pick you up on the way (someone with the initials JCAM decided to fizzle)

Stresses and Rants...Rants and Stresses

Welcome back everyone!  I want to take a few lines to say thank you to the international readers who read the blog over October despite my lack of posts.  One week the blog actually had more readers from Russia than America…very impressive.  Thanks for reading and I hope you continue to enjoy the stories and stresses!  Now, onto the post:

In honor of November’s arrival I’m going to give you the top 5 things that have caused me stress recently.  They are in no particular order except for that #5 is the most stressful.  Enjoy!

1.       With all of the retired citizens of Citrus County, you’d think that I would have lost some of my disdain for the driving habits that are commonplace on the highways and trails on my way to work…I haven’t.  Let me begin by explaining that my morning commute has become much more enjoyable as I have started to leave earlier so I can avoid some of the “I have nowhere to be right now” crowd (which is more prevalent than makes sense).  HOWEVER, every night I head to the gym around 8:30pm and travel on a dark stretch of road known as Homosassa Trail.  The speed limit is 55 and it serves as a connection between two highways that I need to travel.  It never fails that someone in a wood-panel laminated PT cruiser or a Cadillac sedan is driving with its brights on…at 40 mph.  This is my nightmare. (note: if you happen to be someone over the age of 70 and you get nervous while driving on dark stretches of road and you don’t know how to push the gas pedal downward so as to propel your vehicle at or about the posted speed limit…you should probably avoid stretches of road that are not well lit and require speeds above 35.)

2.       What happened to “I Used To Be Fat” on MTV?!?!  This was a fantastic show!  I came home early from the gym tonight only to find that some True Life episode had taken its place?  Maybe I missed the memo…or maybe I just haven’t been watching as much MTV now that Jersey Shore is between seasons, but I am thoroughly disappointed.  (Note: one of my favorite afternoons was about 3 Sunday’s ago when I watched a marathon session of the first season while eating absurd amounts of food…yay metabolism!!) (note #2: apparently the show is on at 10:30 ET…and rather than delete the above stress, I’ll just make this extra note…my blog)

3.       I missed an event in Citrus County this last weekend known as The Great American Cooter Fest…I repeat: I MISSED THE GREAT AMERICAN COOTER FESTIVAL!!!. You cannot imagine my level of disappointment.  With events such as the Miss Cooter Fest Finals and the Cooter Scooter Race in which you can win the “Cooter Cup”, I feel like I missed an opportunity.  Here is a link for those of you interested in what “The Legend of the Cooter” is all about: http://bit.ly/tRO2lJ  (Note: I was also unable to attend the Mullet Festival with my friend RT up in the Niceville/Ft Walton Beach area a few weekends ago…again…just a missed opportunity…but don’t worry, this weekend is the “Stone Crab Jam” and there will be a lengthy post about the insane amount of Stone Crab that I take down.)

4.       This Eastern Time Zone is really messing with my head…and TV watching schedule (as you can tell from stress #2).  I am so used to looking at listed airing times and automatically deducting an hour or two (I grew up in the Mountain Time Zone) to find out when the show will be on, that I’ve found it hard to break the habit.  Additionally, I cannot believe how late sporting events start out here!  Some of the World Series games didn’t get over until well after midnight…and don’t get me started on Monday Night Football.  It’s almost impossible to finish watching these games unless I’m invested (and for those of you who know me well enough…you know that I don’t really have a vested interest in most sports/teams…at least not to the point where I will lose sleep over catching a game that I’ll see the highlights of the next morning).  Overall, I’ve started to get used to the TV schedule, but it isn’t coming easily…hard to break old habits.

5.       This is the final…and most important stress…for this post.  Yesterday, while walking in toward the front door from my car…I saw the largest spider I have ever seen that wasn’t separated from me by a thick wall of glass.  It seriously looked like a tarantula…and apparently it could have been one.  I don’t pretend to like spiders, but I have never been afraid of them…until I saw this one sauntering across the sidewalk.  It looked like it was hungry and wanted to snack on a crane…or one of these sickly looking cows that Florida breeds. (not to get off on a rant here, but you should see the cows down here…they look like they are absolutely starving.  I’m not sure you can get a steak big enough for a full portion from any single cow.  Now I’m not sure if these are the “free range” cows or “grass fed” cows, but I can tell you that there’s a reason that the best beef comes from the Mid-West…I’ll be sticking to stone crab, oysters, and shrimp while I’m down here.) I now check under my covers and pillows before I go to bed to make sure I don’t become some spider’s midnight snack…and that...is stressfull.

Thanks for reading everyone!  If anyone has any good Halloween stories that they would like to share on here, feel free to write them up and email me by Thursday!