Welcome back everybody! For those of you who didn’t know, I flew up to Minneapolis this weekend so I could attend the wedding of JM (nicknamed Stor…thus the title of the post) and EB (…now EM). The following stories are from the trip.
I flew AirTran from Tampa to Milwaukee to MPLS and for the most part everything went off without an issue…just an extended lay-over in Milwaukee…but there was a Chili’s right around the corner from my terminal…can you say blessing in disguise? (more on this later) I know you all want to hear about the debauchery from the wedding, but first I have a few observations/talking points I want to discuss before I get into that:
1. There should a maximum size that a person can be before you are required to purchase another seat… I’m not talking about someone who is “just a little overweight” I’m talking about an inability to get the arm rest down because of your size…it’s honestly staggering how large some people can get. (and of course, 2 of the larger people on my flights sat right next to yours truly…stress
2. It is impressive how much information people will disclose to random strangers they sit next to on flights. I got 5 different life stories on 6 different flights and they all went into shocking amounts of detail (2 were recently divorced, 1 was a “life-long bachelor” (and from the looks of things, not by choice), and the other 2 weren’t memorable) In fact, the only life story I didn’t get was from a couple of guys I met at Chili’s who randomly also sat next to me on the flight. We each had a Jack and Coke on the flight together and none of us overshared...just normal conversation that didn’t involve all of our personal problems. At the end of the flight, the stewardess forgot to charge us so it was free…which was nice.
3. I had the exact same flight crew on my flights to and from Milwaukee from and to Tampa (follow that?). I could see if it was a flight into some small town, but Tampa and Milwaukee? I found this to be odd. But then again, I don’t fly all that often so maybe this is something that’s commonplace…TW from Arizona, if you’re reading, please shed some “culture” on this situation if you would.
The night before the wedding, I was picked up at the airport only to be transported to what can solitarily be described as a “townie bar” in Waconia, MN (which is where the wedding was held). Picture a half-perkins-type restaurant mixed with a raging dance club…that leaves you pretty close…now on top of that, picture a fairly respectable patio and the outer décor of a village in West Germany…now you’ve got it. As I stated before, it was a definite townie bar and had all the usual suspects: the guy who is waaay too old to be there and has been there since 4, the former high school jock who hasn’t moved on, the guy who wears too many accessories and has two (clearly high maintenance) women at his side, and the largest group of smokers you’ll ever see in your life crowded around several lighters on the patio. Despite all of this the bar tenders put together a performance that ranks as high as any bartending performance I’ve ever been a part of. The place was packed and I didn’t have to wait more than 5 minutes to get my drinks. (they didn’t even have to ask me how to make a Lunchbox…I really can’t put into words how much that surprised me…really just a job well done there).
Alright, onto the wedding. To be honest, the only part I really paid attention to were the readings…and for good reason. As most of you know, I like to speak…and more than that, I like to speak in public. So naturally, I’ve been chosen to be the reader at all of my former roommates’ weddings thus far…that is, until this one. I spent the duration of the readings staring down the readers and begging for them to stumble…the only hiccup occurred when the first reader had to pause after she became a little verklempt. Needless to say, I wasn’t pleased. (Note: obviously I wore my 3-piece suit (The Joseph) to the wedding with a knot that would make Merril Hoge salivate…just in case one of the readers wasn’t up to snuff and needed a reliever reader. My two PIC’s were also looking incredibly dapper…feel free to gawk on facebook)
The reception was held a few miles away from our hotel and featured some free kegs and a DJ who appeared to have his “stuff” together. Stories were shared, drinks were drank, skirts were chased, and the chicken buffet left most of us satisfied til morning. It ended as most receptions end: with a large contingent of drunk patrons sloppily performing the Cupid Shuffle while the bartenders dispose of empty kegs…and that’s how it should be.
This morning was moderately stressful for multiple reasons:
1. I had to wake up at 7 to get to the airport in time for my 10:30 departure.
2. I had a top-3 all-time hang-over.
3. Dry decided to wander off after the reception and not tell anyone where he went…and he was my ride to the airport. Luckily, he left his keys in the hotel room, so I just jacked his vehicle and drove myself to the airport. If IR hadn’t offered to ride shotgun and take the car back to Waconia, I was willing to leave the car running at the terminal…thanks Dry…
Somehow, I made it back to the HLC without too many issues (besides what I chronicled earlier). Glad to be back here and even more pleased that I’m going to bed now. Hope you all had a great weekend! If any of you have a story for SCT, send it my way!
No comments:
Post a Comment